snow!

i have been thinking lately that i'd miss the snow, so it was a pleasant surprise that eugene experienced a snowstorm yesterday. i guess it only happens once every couple of years so the city is not prepared for it. all schools were closed yesterday and today and even the library closed early last night!

here is the view from our front door:






and a random photo of me, nice & cozy inside, cooking:

8th month update

i feel as if i haven't posted anything in a while. things are going very well. i feel that i've had an easy pregnancy. i've felt great throughout these past eight months- pretty much like myself, only bigger and slower.

our baby's movements are very different now. it's hard to believe that the midwife once said, "she's just a peanut". she is so big & heavy now. and while she used to bounce around from one side to the other, she now pretty much stays in one place and just kicks (and punches) from there. there just isn't enough room to flip over or swim around anymore.

one thing that is surprising is seeing and feeling so many bumpy, bony body parts. we can't always tell if something is a knee or a heel, a fist or an elbow. and though i always thought of a pregnant belly as similar to a basketball- round and firm, mine is sometimes more like a sack of potatoes! if she moves into a certain position, my belly is quite misshapen and we can actually see all these visible lumps.

we try to capture this on video from time to time but it seems like whenever we get the camera ready, she stops moving. but that's ok; i know there will be many opportunities to catch all of her cute & amazing antics on camera after she's born.


here are some photos from yesterday:

baby shower

we were so touched a few weeks ago when some of greg's colleagues said that they were planning a baby shower for us. it took place on friday and was so much fun! he really works with a great group of people and it was so nice to celebrate with them.

they had a great idea (which i highly recommend for anyone throwing a baby shower): everyone decorated a onesie with fabric markers. it is a fun activity and the parents-to-be come away with unique wearable art for their new baby. though they were all cool, i didn't have room for all of them on here and took some photos of just a few:

pregnancy photos

well, after some requests for photos, i realized that we need to take more as we don't have very many. but i'll put what i have here and we will try to be more diligent about taking pictures. my cousin lisa got married this summer and graciously shared her photos with me, so i have two from her wedding:





















with the beautiful bride! (5 months)
















with my sisters (erin & amy) and aunt susan; (5 months)





















playing carcassonne (6 months)





















making tea; (7 months)


















reading to the baby; (7 1/2 months)

breech no more

until recently, our little girl had been breech. her head, which felt like a little apple, was almost always right above my belly button. as with several pregnancy concerns, i was finding some conflicting information. on the one hand, they say not to worry- that most babies will get themselves into position before labor starts. (only 3% of babies are still breech at term.) on the other hand, the majority of babies have turned by this gestational stage. and i just wondered why she hadn't seemed to want to. it could just be because she's small; they say that once babies' heads get heavier, they tend to tip upside-down.

in any case, i'm no longer worried about this. at our last two appointments, the midwives found that she was head down. this is great news, since prior to this she was breech at every visit ever since our 20 week ultrasound. (we are 31/32 weeks now.) even though many people (including greg- many times) assured me that there never was cause for concern, i do feel relieved.

-------

i am feeling great as we begin our last two months and everything is going well. the baby is much bigger and seems to be very strong- her movements are powerful and we can now see her moving around when we look at my belly. we will have our first (of six) childbirth classes this coming monday evening and we are looking forward to that.

also, we are so, so happy and excited that, at least for the first four years of her life, our baby will have a president that her country can be proud of.

third trimester!

well, here we are at the third trimester and things are going very well. we had an eventful appointment last week at the birth center. it was time for my glucose screening test to rule out gestational diabetes. the sugar drink made me extremely lightheaded and i had to lie down.

we also met with the lactation consultant, who signed us up for their breastfeeding class. i was really excited to meet with her because i care a lot about learning how to breastfeed correctly so that we can avoid problems. i did have a dream many months ago that the baby latched on without a problem and started nursing like a pro so i'm hoping that will prove to be a good sign.

our birth center is certified "baby friendly" by unicef and the world health organization. facilities that have earned this distinction have taken certain steps to ensure successful breastfeeding among their families. it is one of only 67 in the US with this distinction, so we feel pretty lucky to have found it.

finally, we talked about selecting a pediatrician and the midwife gave us some lists and literature. how exciting! we think we have found one. we are going to visit with her in a few weeks. if it all works out, it'll be awesome because her office is just a few blocks away from the house. (and proximity is really important as we're still living car-free.)

first storytime

i cannot believe it didn't occur to me sooner (must be the "pregnancy brain" phenomenon i've been hearing about) but a book suggested reading to the baby in utero. i thought it sounded like a great idea so we started today. i pulled a few books off the shelf in her room, waited until she was awake and moving around, and then started with "one fish, two fish". it was fun!

i can't help but think that it would be so cool/amazing if we read certain books often that then seem familiar to her later, when we re-read them again after she's born.

i am a volunteer!

i am officially a volunteer at the eugene public library. like cpl, they use envisionware (a program that manages patrons' PC appointments). but it is new and apparently, causing confusion among patrons. so i will be assisting them with signing up to use a computer and explaining how the system works.

the epl volunteer program is extremely well-organized, with a formal application/interview process and training. i had an orientation last week and will begin tomorrow.

i'm excited to get back into libraryland. i miss it!

dad

while we were at the hospital, all of the nurses kept calling greg "dad". at one point, i pointed this out to him and he smiled and said that he liked it. it was so cute.

one of the nurses told us that the firstborn tends to be the achiever. she said that she'll likely do well in school, like books, be very responsible, and care a lot about achieving goals. she also told greg that her relationship with him will be a very important one and that at times, she'll be closer to him than to me. we were both kind of happy & glowing while hearing this prophecy. it was just so nice to have our focus redirected during that moment and to think about the future with our baby.

greg has been so wonderful throughout the pregnancy and he was great last weekend while i was on bed rest, going to get groceries, cooking meals, taking care of the house, etc. i feel incredibly happy that our daughter will have such a caring and supportive (and fun) father, who is so looking forward to her arrival and excited about becoming a dad.

healthy & happy

well, we are doing much better now. the bed rest seems to have done the trick. i feel great. the contractions have stopped and the midwife said that i can begin incorporating my usual activities into my life. basically, i'm starting slow to see if anything causes a problem. but i really don't think it will. the most important thing is that i now know what feels normal and what doesn't, which isn't always easy during pregnancy, since you regularly seem to encounter new & sometimes bizarre sensations.

while we were in the hospital, we had some more ultrasound pictures taken. our baby always seems to have her hands near her face. (which is also how i sleep.) and this time, she had her feet there too! (that i can't do.) the technician said that she was playing with her foot as if it were a little toy. it was just so cute, i thought i'd put it up here:

"i'm ok. there's just a lot going on in my uterus."

this was something i said to greg recently and we both started laughing a lot after i said it. at the time, i didn't know what was going on but now that i look back, i just had a sense that something wasn't quite right.

this past wednesday, i started to notice some contractions. at first, i wasn't worried because i had read that it is normal to experience "Braxton Hicks" contractions (that is, contractions not related to labor) from the fifth month on. however, by the next evening, they increased in frequency and i became concerned. we called the midwife who was on call and she said we should meet her at the hospital.

once we arrived, they hooked me up to a fetal heart monitor, which also measures contractions. it was a tremendous relief to learn that the baby was doing well. her heart rate was good and she was very active (as per norm). but it was also disconcerting because the contractions were three minutes apart and fairly strong. chris, one of the five midwives we see, was great. she put me on an IV to prevent dehydration and some medication that would relax the muscle of the uterus. she also ordered two tests: a fetal fibronectin, which determines if labor is imminent within the next two weeks, and an ultrasound to measure cervical length. i was most scared when she said, "i don't think you'll go into labor tonight." the idea of actually going into preterm labor was unthinkable and not something i wanted to face. though technically speaking, a baby has a good chance at survival at 24 weeks, going into labor now would obviously be a horrible thing.

i became absolutely focused on keeping the baby in for a few more months. that is all i began to care about. it was really strange because just last week (back in a more innocent time), i said to greg that i thought being on bed rest would be such a horrible thing in pregnancy. the thought of not being able to go for a walk or cook a meal or do anything seemed unbearable. but my feelings immediately changed in that moment and i began to hope for that outcome. i thought that if we could just slow or stop these contractions, i'd happily stay in bed or do whatever it takes to avoid going into labor for a few more months.

the contractions continued through the night but began to wane in the morning. the results of both tests were reassuring and we were discharged from the hospital that afternoon. i was to be on bed rest for three days and see the midwife at the birth center on monday. things have really improved since then. i am feeling great and have only had a few contractions, which have been much more mild.

it is not known what causes some women to have early contractions. chris ruled out some concerns that i had: that there could be a problem with the baby or uterus or that it could have been something i did. she said that it is not related to any of these. if there were a problem with the baby or uterus, the 22 week ultrasound would have shown that. and many women who lead more physically strenuous lives than i do (athletes, women who work full-time, or take care of their other children) don't ever have this problem. she said it is not yet known what can cause it. but we do have a good idea of how to prevent preterm labor from starting. i am to avoid standing and lying on my back as much as possible, drink a ton of water throughout the day, and continue to maintain a healthy diet. we are also going to repeat both of the tests in two weeks.

greg and i are feeling very happy and relieved at this point because the situation has improved dramatically. and we feel lucky to have gotten our wish: the contractions have decreased and i didn't go into early labor. but i do feel somewhat confused and disappointed about all of this. i have never had any health problems and the pregnancy seemed to be progressing so well. at every prenatal appointment and ultrasound, everything seemed perfectly healthy. we had no warning signs or cause for concern at any point within the past six months. so this seems to really have come out of the blue. ultimately, i have to accept that we probably won't ever know why this happened.

on a final note, i feel very pleased that we elected to work with a midwifery practice that is affiliated with the hospital here. i absolutely never thought that i would need to visit the hospital but pregnancy and childbirth (i've discovered) are less predictable than we would like. and it was very reassuring that we were able to easily get such great care and medical help at a crucial time. we are still hoping to give birth naturally at the birth center and chris said that as long as we can make it to 37 weeks, this issue won't prevent us from being deemed "low-risk" enough to deliver there.

our daughter

we were absolutely thrilled to learn that we'll be having a baby girl! it is just wonderful news and we couldn't be happier. she will be the first granddaughter and the first niece in the family and many people love her already.

girl or boy????

i think every expecting couple spends a lot of time wondering if they're going to have a daughter or a son. and we are no different. it has been fun and exciting to think about. and i honestly cannot say that i am hoping that our baby is one rather than the other. greg and i both would like to have at least one of each. but any combination would be great. since i have so many sisters, i sometimes think that it would be wonderful to have a daughter. but then when i think of jen and her three boys, it makes the idea of being the mother of sons seem incredible too. it's also strange because you realize quite quickly that it's difficult to avoid veering into stereotypical territory when contemplating what a son or daughter would be like. and as greg said the other night when i asked him if he thinks most fathers-to-be would like to have a son: he can't think of any particular activity that he'd want to do with a son (fishing, reading comics, going to see superhero movies) that he couldn't do with a daughter.

my pregnancy dreams have continued to give me conflicting ideas about whether we'll be having a girl or a boy.

to summarize:

one in my first trimester was a happy birth dream in which i had a boy. in another recent dream, i had a girl who was very smart! and in the third (and most confusing) i had a girl and she was incredibly cute and i was so in love with her. and as i was holding her, greg and his mom both told me that she wasn't our baby- that i was still carrying ours, who was a boy and this baby i was holding belonged to someone else!

we are going for an ultrasound today and may be able to learn which we'll be having. i'll be sure to keep you all posted!!

feeling the baby move

this is an exciting time because i can now feel the baby moving. i have been waiting for this! the first few times (about 2 weeks ago or so) it was such an extremely subtle and fleeting sensation that i couldn't be sure.

but now i feel the movements every day and there's no doubt what it is. it is a really amazing experience. and kind of bizarre and otherworldly too, as it is clear that there is a live person moving around inside of me.

whenever i feel it, i try to say something to the baby. it actually felt slightly awkward at first to talk out loud to my belly but i like to think that these are our first interactions, as the baby can now hear. i just say hello and, "i can feel you moving in there" and that i can't wait to meet him/her.

it'll be exciting when greg is able to feel it too.

greg finally gets to hear the heartbeat

we had our next prenatal check-up today- the first one at our new birth center in eugene. it was fantastic. greg was able to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time and he was smiling as the midwife listened for it.

earlier this week, i had been stressing the fact that there has been a bureaucratic delay with getting my medical records transferred from chicago. they'll arrive eventually but they didn't arrive in time for this appointment. but everything worked out okay: i filled out lengthy forms about my medical history and they were able to see me even without my original paperwork, something for which i am so grateful because i didn't want to postpone my care.

we left with a feeling of security that all is well with the baby and happiness at our choice of center. this was the second of center's five midwives that we've met and she was really cool- nice and calm and intelligent.


  paperwork

examination room

we've chosen our birth center!

greg and i are very happy right now because we have found our midwives & birth center.

we knew that we wanted a natural birth and couldn't decide whether we wanted a home birth or to have the baby in a freestanding birth center. in the state of oregon, there are many, many options for women and many talented midwives practice here. i found this birth center online before we moved here and we scheduled a tour/orientation.

prior to the tour, i was a bit nervous because it is affiliated with the hospital here and i did not want overly medically-minded staff or any unnecessary interventions. so i was very relieved when the presentation started. five midwives work here and the tour was led by one of them. she was so knowledgeable and warm and we immediately felt confident that this was the right place for us. as you can see, it looks like a home and it is very comfortable. they only work with low-risk women and as a result, have excellent outcomes. their philosophy is that it is the woman herself who births her baby and the practitioners are there to support her in this process. 

there is an article in the register-guard about the birth center that explains what it's all about better than i can.

also, some of you know me very well and understand my interest in natural childbirth but others may not know of this and may be unfamiliar with the concept. i am planning to write another post that explains why i am so passionate about it but that will be lengthy and for now, i just wanted to share that we have established our prenatal care and birth plans here in eugene, as that was obviously one of our top priorities upon relocating here.

huge in euge

we made it! greg and i are finally both settled here in eugene, oregon and it has been an incredible experience. i arrived two weeks ago and there is way too much to say, so i think i'll leave that for another blog. (when i get it up & running, i'll post a link.) but we are very happy and so satisfied to have made this move. eugene is all that i had hoped/knew it would be. it is also fabulous to be together with greg again. i missed him so much and we are having a great time checking out the city, cooking dinners, and playing carcassonne.

as far as the pregnancy is concerned, i am feeling fantastic! they weren't kidding when they said that the second trimester is the euphoric one. i am eating very well- the proximity to several incredible farmers' markets helps with that. we always have tons of great produce around. and i am not as tired i used to be. i pretty much feel like my normal self again! 

well, an enormous version of my normal self. ridiculous as it sounds, one very strange thing about being pregnant is that you can't help but feel fat. it is so weird. and difficult to understand because obviously, you expect to be growing and you know that your body changes throughout the nine months. but it still is a weird feeling when your pants don't fit anymore.

however, now that my belly is rounding out and i am beginning to look more like a pregnant woman, it doesn't feel as strange. sometimes i look very pregnant and other times you can't really tell. it depends on what i'm wearing. greg took the first in a series of profile photos so that we can see how big i was at various stages (good idea, jen!). i'll post them in a few weeks when we have several.

pregnancy is wonderful!

everything is going so well.

i can't believe how differently i feel now. i can't really say that i was enjoying being pregnant during the early weeks. i remember dealing with the nausea and wondering how women voluntarily go through multiple pregnancies. at the same time, i felt a bit sad because i'd always considered myself to be a maternal type of person and expected to absolutely love pregnancy.

i was relieved to read in a book that it is in the second trimester that many women begin to experience the blissful feelings often associated with pregnancy. and that has certainly been the case for me. i feel great. much more energetic- i am really active, riding my bike and walking every day.* i am very happy and both greg and i are just so excited about becoming parents and finally meeting our child. we can't wait!

*for those who are concerned, my doctor and books i've read insist that the more physically active a pregnant woman is, the healthier she will be and that usually, staying in shape leads to an easier labor & delivery. not only that, they are now finding that babies born to very active women are healthier and have better developed brains. they suspect that it may be due to being jostled in the uterus, which encourages more muscle movement in the fetus. for more about this, check out Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain. i only point this out because it has become clear to me that this is all very different from the common understanding of years ago, when people used to assume that it is a time to take it easy.

endearing things the boys said

                                                                        Billy, Joseph, Harry

1. During dinner one evening, Harry said, "Julie, you're almost an adult now." Erin asked him if she was an adult and he said, "No. You don't have any kids." Then Joe told him, "Harry, they're all adults."

2. Billy said, "Julie's not very big so I think she'll only be having one baby."

3. The boys all were sure that I would be having a boy. Various name recommendations came up, most memorably, Gerald.

4. When I was holding my cousin's newborn, Billy excitedly asked, "Did the baby come out, Julie?" and Harry later quietly approached me, pointed at the baby's chest, and asked, "Julie, is that your baby?" 

5. During a discussion of fetal life/development, Harry asked if the baby was wearing clothes.

i miss them.

sad goodbye

what an emotionally overwhelming time this has been. it's always intense when the aussies come in because we love them so much and want make the most of our short time with them. this year, it was unique because jen isn't the only one who is leaving. i fly out to oregon on the same day. i am really looking forward to moving to eugene and beginning that phase of my life there- and most of all, to seeing greg! at the same time, it's sad saying goodbye to my friends, family, and city. i'll miss everyone!

baby's first photo!

i went for an ultrasound and saw our baby moving around. it was an amazing experience and difficult to put into words just how incredible it was. i couldn't believe how active the baby was. and cute! it was just overwhelming.

the technician was able to get a wonderful shot of the baby's profile and she also captured his/her hand as it was waving around:

it was sad for greg to have to miss out on yet another exciting event but i scanned these and sent them to him. they are now displayed in his cube at work. we're already such proud parents!

missing greg / baby's heartbeat

unfortunately, greg had to go to eugene a few weeks earlier for work and i miss him. it is difficult to be apart during this exciting time. we knew that he would miss our 12-week appointment, at which we would hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time and we were both a little bummed about that.

but my friend jannis had an excellent idea: to call him during the appointment so that he could hear it over the phone. amy & erin were with me and we called greg just as he was heading in to work and he was able to hear it. it was great!

jen and the boys

well, we had a last-minute surprise this summer: jen and the boys came in from melbourne to visit before i move. we totally did not expect them this summer so this was really wonderful.

we have all been living quite communally, with various people picking up groceries and cooking different things for everyone. there is a ton of fresh produce around so that has made it easy for me to eat well during this period of transition between homes.

it is so nice that jen is able to share in the excitement of the pregnancy. and the boys are as enjoyable as ever. they have matured so much! they are extraordinarily happy and self-sufficient children and it is an absolute pleasure to have been able to spend time with them this year.

sleep, disrupted

one unexpected thing about being pregnant is that it disrupts your sleep! i don't know if it happens to everyone, but ever since the very beginning, i haven't been able to sleep as i normally do. prior to being pregnant i could easily sleep in. i also had no trouble falling asleep, staying asleep ( i could sleep through anything!), or getting back to sleep if i did wake up.

i seem to have lost these abilities now. i wake up early naturally. it is really weird. and once i'm up i can't fall back asleep as easily.

amy says it's probably nature's way of preparing me for the upcoming sleepless nights greg and i will be sharing with our new baby.

happy dream

i had such a good dream the other night.

i was in a room by myself and i was giving birth. i was amazed because it happened very quickly and easily. i brought the baby (who was a boy) out into another room where everyone was waiting and i felt triumphant.

it was funny because right away the baby started doing precocious things, like pulling himself up to a standing position when i laid him down on a blanket.

____________

some people believe that they can get to know their baby before it's born. in a book i was reading, one woman claimed to have heard the fetus whispering to her. apparently, the baby even suggested a name for herself. and her husband kept feeling like he was being tickled at night and assumed (as anyone would) that this was his unborn child interacting with him.

i can't say that i believe dreams are prophetic. i've also had dreams that our baby was a girl so unless i'm having twins, i can't rely on my unconscious mind for accurate information. still, it's fun to have these nice dreams. i've heard that some women experience horrible nightmares throughout pregnancy but so far, i've been lucky.

eating during pregnancy

i came across this in one of my pregnancy books:

Best avoided during pregnancy

• sweetened beverages
• candy
• white flour
• chocolate
• ice cream
• cakes and pastries
  
• cookies
• white sugar

i saw this comical list early on and had already consumed something from every category. after i got over feeling sick to my stomach in the early weeks, i was just happy to be able to eat at all.

of course, i know how important it is to eat well during pregnancy. and i try to make the effort. but i have also been surprised to find that i'm drawn to less healthful foods. it is very strange to me that it wasn't until pregnancy that i started to eat sugar cereals and macaroni & cheese (though these are the things i was born & raised on so that could have something to do with it... someone recently told me that she always wanted to eat hot dogs in pregnancy- which she hadn't really eaten since childhood).

some people have been curious to know about my pregnancy eating habits/cravings/aversions/etc. so i'll try to explain what i've been experiencing:

from the very beginning, i could not imagine eating salmon or any fish really. this is too bad because i know that my baby's brain is developing and i'd like to get some omega 3s into my diet. on the plus side, there are always mercury scares to worry about with fish so maybe this is one of those food aversions with some biological sense behind it.

carbs of all kinds have had tremendous appeal- even in the beginning of the pregnancy, when i felt sick. crackers, pasta, rice, & bread were all good. for some odd reason, i could always stomach thai food- especially noodle dishes like pad woon sen and pad kee mao. this was true even when some of my most favorite foods held no appeal.

nowadays, my pregnancy diet more closely resembles my usual eating habits. i can eat most things. hunger in pregnancy is a more intense feeling than non-pregnant hunger, like i'm really driven to eat. my main obsession lately has been great american bagels' everything bagels. they are just so good. i seriously have one most days of the week! i am trying to eat as many fruits and vegetables as i can but i also have been eating more random hard candy! bizarre.

our baby's biggest accomplishment

"This week marks the beginning of the fetal period, which lasts until birth. Your baby's body systems, such as circulatory, nervous, reproductive and digestive, are fully formed during this time. His heart is beating approximately 160-170 beats per minute. Your baby is 27 - 35 mm or 1.06 - 1.38 inches with the length being attributed to the head. He weighs between 3 - 4 grams, or 4 paper clips.

Also, your baby will become much more active then before, but unfortunately, his movements are still too small for you to notice. He will be moving his arms and legs, which can be seen on an ultrasound. Your baby's joints are fully formed, as are his tiny hands, feet, fingers and toes. At this age, he would be able to grab an object, if it were placed in his hand, as he grows more and more sensitive to touch.

Your baby's biggest accomplishment this week is the disappearance of the tail!"

(from babiesonline.com)

(almost) back to normal

it has been quite a hectic time and i haven't been able to write for a while but thankfully, the move is over! it's still a tad unnerving to be uprooted but at least the stuff is all now safe & sound in eugene.

i am feeling so much better. it's as if i'm back to my normal self- the main exception being that i am extremely tired. i'm not the most active person to begin with but the first trimester has proven to be very tiring. it feels very strange to not be able to stay awake for a movie or to feel exhausted when i've only walked to the bagel shop and back. What to Expect When You're Expecting was reassuring on this point, claiming that a pregnant body at rest is working harder than a non-pregnant body mountain climbing. i enjoy that one tremendously! and remind myself of it when i feel puzzled at my exhausted state.

2nd prenatal checkup

we had our second prenatal visit with dr. reynolds- who is awesome. it turns out that the surly nurse from last time was right- dr. reynolds did in fact check for the heartbeat with a fetal doppler and couldn't detect it. however, we did hear mine and were all relieved to learn that i'm alive. ha ha.

it's likely that at our next visit, which will be at 12 weeks, we'll get to hear the baby's heartbeat and we can't wait!

also, my bloodwork came back and i'm rh negative! this means that if my baby is rh positive, there's a chance that my body may respond as if it were allergic to the baby and attack my baby's blood. yikes! how horrible. luckily, this can be prevented with a rh immune-globulin shot later in the pregnancy and again at delivery.

another goofy photo:

baby's first bike the drive

this morning we rode "bike the drive", chicago's annual happy bike event: lake shore drive is closed to cars and people of all ages ride their bikes from 6am-10am. we almost didn't make it there in time because i overslept; they don't let you start after 9:00. when we got there, we were guided onto the lakefront bike path at first and i was bummed. but shortly thereafter, we saw a ramp leading onto the highway. there was a police car blocking it but no cop in sight so we kind of snuck back on to LSD with a bunch of other people and made it all the way to montrose before the ride ended and they had to guide people off the road. it was so great! i think the baby enjoyed it as much as we did.

here are some (dorky) post-ride shots:

check it out:

bike the drive

first prenatal visit

we were really looking forward to our first prenatal checkup. we took the day off work. greg called home the night before and gathered his family's medical history and was all prepared. but it wasn't quite what we expected. essentially, the nurse practitioner just asked me a lot of questions and had none at all for greg! 

we had been secretly hoping that they might try to listen for the baby's heartbeat at this visit. even though it's very early, we saw a doctor detecting the heartbeat of a baby at 8 weeks in Pregnancy for Dummies- the dvd. but when we asked the nurse about it, she said that it was too early. not only that, but we were scheduled to come back in 1-2 weeks to meet with the doctor and she said the she "guaranteed" that the doctor would try but wouldn't find the heartbeat at the next visit as well!

oh well. we'll just have to be patient.

i love information

my friend jenny was in chicago and brought me many pregnancy books! they have complimented the ones i already have and have proven extremely helpful already.

it's especially nice to have The Expectant Father. it is disappointing how little is published for dads-to-be. so far, greg and i have discovered that most of what's available attempts to be humorous but ends up being lame. so far, he is really enjoying this book though.

queasy life lessons

at first i thought i was going to be among the lucky few who don't experience morning sickness. the first week or so was great! i felt totally normal. but then it hit. morning sickness is an awful thing. it is really strange because you have these two opposing feelings: being hungry on the one hand and finding the idea of eating completely unappealing on the other.

i'm starting to recognize that pregnancy is a very sensitizing experience. the things you go through make you more sympathetic to others. for example, i now can relate to people who like to eat bland (boring) food. as a passionate cook & eater, i really could not understand this before and felt that they were missing out. but i've had the experience several times now of wanting only the most mundane foods (pancakes, toast) and finding anything with flavor utterly unappetizing.

i can see how pregnancy totally prepares you for becoming someone's mom. from the start, it really isn't just about you anymore.

it's really true

when planning a pregnancy, you begin to learn about all the factors affecting fertility and how to optimize your chances of conceiving. and then the books caution you about miscarriage and complications and so by the time you're pregnant, you don't know if it's ok to be excited. it's strange. you feel very happy- it's what you've been wanting. but there's this ominous voice persistently lurking around warning, "it's still early".

luckily for me, that passed quickly. it helped to speak to jen & mom on the phone. they assured me that this was it: i was pregnant. it was validating to hear from women who have had children that i was authorized to feel excited and i lost my uncertainty. by the time the doctor confirmed it a few days later, i didn't even need to hear it from a professional. i felt that i was pregnant.

we're pregnant!

greg and i took a pregnancy test and it was positive! we are amazed. we had read that couples try for about a year on average to conceive so we thought we'd begin trying posthaste. and it worked. we weren't so sure if this one test was enough evidence; we were optimistic but wanted to be sure that it was real so we took another test two days later and it's true: we're going to have a baby!